Lebanon church members donate dresses, money to wed 16 couples at once

If you thought planning one wedding could be overwhelming, try 16 at once.

Oct. 13 will forever become a special day for 32 men and women who are taking part in One Big Wedding at Calvary Chapel Lebanon at 1 p.m. on Saturday. The church will marry the 16 couples simultaneously in a ceremony called One Big Wedding, to be followed by a proper reception in the old schoolhouse’s cafeteria and gym.

One Big Wedding probably sounds like a publicity stunt, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. All the couples participating delayed getting married for one reason or another – often financial – so the church community banded together to ensure their big day could finally take place.

“I was surprised at how many people got so enthused about the idea from the very beginning,” said Thom Keller, one of the pastors at Calvary Chapel. “How enthused and how many.”

Almost everything for the wedding was either donated or paid for by a member of the church.

“The first Sunday we announced One Big Wedding, one man came up and said, ‘I want to pay for the marriage licenses,’” said Keller. “Another person came up and said they want to provide all the flowers. Somebody paid for all the rings.

“Somebody else wanted to pay for the marriage licenses,” said Donna Bender, an administrator at Calvary Chapel assisting with the planning. “I said, ‘They’re already taken.’ Then Thom had the idea we should get rings. I presented it to this couple, and they said, ‘Yeah. If we can’t do licenses, we’ll buy them rings.’ That was pretty cool.”

“Women donated their wedding dresses,” said Keller. “Would you have expected that? That blew me away.”

Licenses, bands, flowers, dresses, hair and makeup for the brides, suits for the grooms, the photographer, and food and entertainment for the reception – including 400 cupcakes in lieu of a cake – were all provided. And if people couldn’t pay for something, they tried to find another way to help or just be part of the event.

“We had an overabundance of volunteers sign up,” said Ginger Snyder, another Calvary Chapel administrator involved with the planning. “Over 60 people.”

The idea for One Big Wedding came from a California pastor who shared the concept at a conference Keller was attending. Before long, the wheels were in motion at Calvary Church, which held sign-ups, then began vetting the couples.

The couples participated in pre-marital counseling and were asked to take part in six weeks of marriage classes. Each of the men and women made their intentions known through this process, said Keller.

Each of them wanted to get married. Many simply lacked the means. Perhaps others became a little complacent over time. Whatever the reason, One Big Weekend eliminated any and all barriers.

“A lot of people live paycheck to paycheck, and you take a wedding – that’s a lot more than a paycheck,” said Keller. “A number of people knew it was the right thing to do and wanted to get married. This was just what pushed them over the edge to make the decision, and we’re really happy about that.”

One couple remarked they didn’t have close friends or family to share the occasion, so they put it off.

“Think about this couple getting married at a justice of the peace’s office, or here in a church with me and no guests, as compared to what this is going to look like,” said Keller. “The place flooded with people, cheers and applause, a dress, the whole thing.”

When the opportunity presented to be married in a crowded church, the couple jumped at it.

“One of the brides, she gave me the biggest hug,” said Bender. “I didn’t even know her, but I started to talk to her and she doesn’t have family. She said, ‘We are so thankful you are doing this because now we can come feel like we’re here as part of a family. She was gleaming.”

“That’s one of the best things I’ve seen is just working with the couples and seeing how joyful they are over this,” said Snyder. “A lot of them have very limited resources.”

It’s not just the couples, either. Many of the church members who made donations are ecstatic for the big day as well. Keller was moved when discussing some of their contributions, specifically those of married men like himself who have been so generous.

“There have been a number of aha! moments, but one of them has been when men responding with enthusiasm, wanting to be involved,” said Keller. “I can tell from their voice and their eyes that it goes back to their wedding. They were so excited for their own wedding that they get excited about being able to be a part of this for people that couldn’t afford it.

“That’s what surprised me most is how it connected with people on a heart level. I expected people to like the idea. I didn’t expect the emotional connection they felt.”

Unfortunately, if you are hoping to attend the wedding, be prepared to be far from the action. Each of the couples could invite up to 25 guests, and while Calvary Chapel is by no means a small building, some of the overflow crowd will be moved to separate rooms where they can watch the service on monitors.

Yet, Keller views a huge crowd as a positive, too. Not only should it make for a memorable experience for the brides and grooms, but he hopes One Big Wedding will also allow people to see the church in a different light.

“For people to see the church so enthused about this and so excited and the applause, I think it’s going to blow people away,” said Keller. “It’s going to destroy some of those prejudices people have against the church.”

This story comes to us through a partnership between WITF and The Lebanon Daily News.