A sympathetic ear helps one man break the cycle of addiction

Newsrooms across the commonwealth have spent years documenting the opioid crisis in their own communities. But now, in the special project State of Emergency: Searching for Solutions to Pennsylvania’s Opioids Crisis, we are marshalling resources to spotlight what Pennsylvanians are doing to try to reverse the soaring number of overdose deaths.

WITF is releasing more than 60 stories, videos and photos throughout July. This week, you will find stories about initial response and how addition affects families.

 

 

(Washington County) — Shawn English recently weathered a storm.

Having fallen behind on payments, English was about to have his car impounded – a car that he earned providing personal care to homebound seniors and riding his bike in sub-zero temperatures to get to his other job at a gas station.

English, who spent 37 years in addiction and in and out of institutions and prisons, who lived on the streets, who sold drugs and guns out of a church, who was a “garbage disposal who took anything not to feel,” was ready to throw away more than three years of clean living.

“I was frustrated. I was stressed out. I thought I let myself down. My little self started to kick back up, like ‘OK. Let’s do something to get your car back.’ I was getting ready to make a conscious decision to do something real bad,” he said. “I was getting ready to start doing a lot of crazy shit.”

This storm was different, though.

This time, he had a home, a job and people who relied upon him.

So, instead of reverting to his old ways, instead of “hustling” to make money, English, 53, confided in a supervisor at work.

“I’m not permitted to ask questions, but I told him if he needs me anytime, pick up the phone and call,” said Dana Mattern, supply chain manager of the Meadows Racetrack and Casino. “I said, ‘Don’t let a bad situation lead you back. I’m willing to listen.’”

Mattern’s willingness to listen, and English’s willingness to talk, prevented him from relapsing, said English.

“I tell people, ‘I ain’t better than nobody. I just know where I been and I ain’t trying to go back there,’” said English. “That’s why I say, ‘Share your experience.’ Where you been, you can help me. Where I been, I can help the next. It’s a domino effect.

“Some of us need outside help. We’ve got to go talk to people. If you don’t feel comfortable sharing with 30 people, find somebody, a counselor, psychiatrist. You gotta talk about it.”

Breaking the cycle, he said, takes time and honesty with yourself. And it isn’t easy.

English said he’ll never get to a point where he no longer worries about going back to his previous life.

“Rome wasn’t built in a day. So I’m not going to get well in a day. I got 37 years of addiction. I got three years of sobriety time. It’s not balancing,” he said. “That’s like getting a job, everybody else been on the job for 10 years, you’re new man on the block. You got two years. It’s not balancing. You gotta wait your turn.

“So I went through the storm, and I’ll go through another, and then another after that. But I ain’t giving up.”

English was honored for his work in February by Pinnacle Entertainment, parent company of The Meadows.

“He’s one of the hardest-working guys I have. He’s the first one to admit if he’s made a mistake. … Anything you need, you’ll get it from him,” Mattern said. “He’s humble about being recognized. He said, ‘I’m just doing my job.’ I said, ‘That’s what is great about it.’

Though his job keeps him busy, and he recently took on another, English is known in Washington’s recovery community. He has helped several people get into rehabilitation facilities and is asked to speak at recovery events.

“I’m very grateful somebody want to hear something I got to say. I got good people in my life, I got family back – everything I always wanted when I was in the streets. All you gotta do is work for it,” he said. “Got a roof over my head. Got food in the refrigerator. I’m happy. I’ve never felt this good in my life. And it’s getting better and better.”