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News Smart Talk Long lost relatives -- the rights of adopted children and birth parents -- Radio Smart Talk
News Smart Talk Long lost relatives -- the rights of adopted children and birth parents -- Radio Smart Talk
| Long lost relatives -- the rights of adopted children and birth parents -- Radio Smart Talk |
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| Tuesday, 29 September 2009 15:40 |
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Earlier this month, two sets of brothers and sisters who were adopted as young children and grew up near one another in Maine held a tearful reunion on national television. The story got so much attention because the two brothers were working together at a furniture store not knowing they were brothers.
The newly reunited family credited Maine's law that makes it easier for adoptees to get access to their birth records. Maine is one of only eight states that has such laws. Pennsylvania does not.
We've often heard the happy stories about adoptees finding their birth parents or siblings. But what about those who don't want to be found? Are open records for adoptions a good thing?
Guests: Adam Pertman, Executive Director of Evan B. Donaldson Institute and author of Adoption Nation
Mary Robinson, Pres & CEO National Council for Adoption
State Senator Stewart Greenleaf (R-Montgomery), Chairman Task Force Adoption Law
LISTEN TO PROGRAM
 Actual Consensus Amid Controversy (on birth records)?
By Craig Cohen
I dread the really nasty “pro” and “con” shows.
You know, the programs where we discuss a controversial issue, and there’s one organization leading the charge in favor of doing something, and another organization leading the charge against it. And the same two people representing those organizations seem to go from radio show to TV show, town hall to public forum, debating the issue, spitting out the same talking points, and trying to rattle the other’s cages by referring to specious statistics or making wild statements.
Sometimes – when an issue is just so explosive, so divisive – no matter how much we try to find reasonable guests to offer cogent analysis from opposing sides – the conversation inevitably devolves. I’m pleased it’s been a rarity on Radio Smart Talk, but it has happened, and when it does, it leaves me with a sour taste in my mouth. As the host tasked with facilitating the discussion, I feel like somehow I let you down.
So, while I was looking forward to Wednesday’s (9/30/09) conversation about adoption and the clash between an adoptee’s desire to know her/his roots, and a birth parent’s desire for privacy, I was also fearful that it would become “one of those shows.”
Turns out, I had no reason to worry, because our guests on both sides of this debate couldn’t have been more thoughtful and respectful of each other. Yes, they did pull out their statistics and occasionally disagreed with one another’s assertions, but it was always in a calm, rational manner.
At the heart of the debate was what to do when that adoptee’s desire to know – to gain access to birth and medical records – clashes with a birth parent’s desire for privacy. Some states have dealt with this issue, establishing some form of so-called “open records laws” – but Pennsylvania has not.
(Comments are encouraged at the end of this column)One guest, Adam Pertman, the Executive Director of the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute, favored giving adoptees access to such information. Another guest, Mary Robinson, the President and CEO of the National Council for Adoption, supported birth parents’ privacy.
You could hear both of them, through their words – and their tone of voice – genuinely seeking common ground.
Our third guest, State Senator Stewart Greenleaf, heard it too:
“As I listen to both parties here talking about this…there’s an area of resolution here. We just have to draft the legislation to…address all those concerns…there’s a very good consensus that can be worked out here.”
Senator Greenleaf, who has tried to draft legislation in the past to address this issue, admitted that he “started out in this process saying [adoptees] had the right to have these records regardless…but I’ve changed that [view].” The Senator seemed to suggest he has a better sense now of what’s at stake for both adoptees and birth parents, and where exceptions to potential rules regarding open records may lie in order to arrive at a consensus.
In other words, the Senator – and our other guests, for that matter – recognized and communicated a desire for compromise. Further, they all seemed to suggest that continued dialogue - like our program - was helping them to shape a beneficial, mutually-agreeable solution.
At the end of Wednesday’s show, Senator Greenleaf told our guests he “would like to have both your expertise to draft this legislation.”
Of course, the rubber will hit the road when Senator Greenleaf introduces that legislation, which he indicated he would try to do before the end of the year. Will the final language yield adequate buy-in from all involved, agreement strong enough that the bill has a genuine chance to be passed?
To keep the discussion going, we will re-broadcast our conversation about adoption and so-called open records policies this Saturday at 1 on WITF 89.5. You can also, of course, hear the program right here at WITF.org, and continue the conversation with your comments below.
Thanks for continuing to contribute to open, honest, and respectful dialogue. After a thoughtful discussion like this one, I don’t feel quite so much dread about preparing for the next “pro/con” show!
- Craig Comments (37)
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written by Maggie , September 30, 2009, 11:16:05 AM A close relative was adopted 77 years ago in PA. She is now 80 years old and more focused on questions about her birth. She would like to have access to her full adoption file. Please consider people in her situation when proposing legislation. At minimum, could a time limit for withholding information after the adoption date be included? Thank you for the great discussion and for considering this. report abuse
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written by Howard , September 30, 2009, 11:21:22 AM Am I right when I say that the Medical registry will only work if the parent who gave up the child also registers. I tried to use this medical registry and was sent a letter that stated that my parents did not register with the same sight. I think it is important that, that be clarified so that it does not give false hope to anyone. As being an adopted person anything that we can find out about ourselves is like finding a needle in the hay stack and to give us a false sense of hope is more then some of us can bare. report abuse
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written by Jane , September 30, 2009, 11:25:36 AM Yes, Howard you are correct. The Adoption Medical History Registry will only work if both the adoptee and the birth parent complete the information. We need more birth pareents submitting medical history information. However, you should know that if in 5 or 10 years that birth parent does register then you will be notified at that time. report abuse
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written by Nancy , September 30, 2009, 11:53:38 AM I have to weigh in here and say I agree 100 percent that we need to know where we come from. I was adopted in 1970 from Lancaster County I am now 39 and recently requested information from Lancaster County for some information on my mother. I feel the need to know who I am, I don't hate my mother for giving me up for adoption but would love to know if I have brothers sisters. We were given no rights to be adopted how is it that we have still no rights to know who we are. I know work for an adoption agency and have also adopted and I have to say that I have saved everything for my son so that one day we can find his mother together and hopefully establish a relationship with her. Also the medical registry does not work I have tried that to and it was unsuccessful because my mother has not opened up and given permission to do this. I think that we just gave adoptee false hope. Just my piece of information. report abuse
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written by Tamara , September 30, 2009, 11:54:51 AM How far back do the “open and closed” records go? I’ll be 50 years old in Nov. and was adopted in 1959. My adoptive parents always told me it was a “private” adoption through an attorney. My adoptive father had a business colleague whose wife worked at the hospital where I was born. I actually learned some details about my biological mother (it was a fluke – a private investigator did some free work for me, but she is now deceased). However, I would like to know more – just as one of your guests said, my heritage and the medical history of my parents (I’ve had ovarian cancer). I have no desire to meet them or any other potential biological relatives. What are my chances in this type of adoption and so long ago? Thank you! report abuse
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written by Greg in Harrisburg , September 30, 2009, 11:55:13 AM Good morning, How much medical information is available to new parents from foreign adoptions? report abuse
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written by JS , September 30, 2009, 12:25:34 PM For those interested in the AMHR, there is a bill (HB 1719) in the House Judiciary Committee right now that would make it mandatory for relinquishing parents to file their NON-IDENTIFYING medical history at the time they petition the court for termination of their parental rights. This way, adoptees and adoptive parents of minor children could have access to this vital health information even if they do not have access to the original birth certificate. I wrote the bill during my legislative fellowship last spring and would be happy to answer questions anyone might have. You may email me at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it report abuse
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written by JS , September 30, 2009, 12:29:07 PM @ Greg: That all depends on the circumstances of the child's adoption and the country from which s/he was adopted. Check with the American Adoption Congress; they can provide you with some great resources regarding international adoption. report abuse
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written by Catherine , September 30, 2009, 06:37:06 PM Obtaining one's Original Birth Certificate is a matter of human right. Being denied access is discrimination. This has nothing to do with medical issues! Registries do not work. Dead people can't register! Any legislation 'allowing' adoptees to have access to medical information that was given at the time of relinquishment is USELESS. What is pertinent medically at the age of relinquishment can be a whole different story 20, 30, 40 years down the line. Just give adoptees access to their own record of birth. Anything less is inhumane. report abuse
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written by Lisa , September 30, 2009, 07:15:29 PM My husband and I are blessed to have adopted two children at birth, both born in the same year. One adoption was open and one was closed. In the case of the closed adoption, that child became critically ill at age 17. We petitioned the court for updated birth parent medical information since doctors could not agree on a diagnosis. The birth mother refused to comply with the request and when finally asked by the social worker, said that nothing had changed since she gave birth. My child is now in college and beginning to wonder; do I look like anyone? This child believes he/she may have found the birth mother on facebook. I completely respect the birth parents' right to privacy, however, genetics plays a major role in predicting disease. A child should have access to that information if it is avaialble. The child with the open adoption has very little information as well; the birth mother was adopted. report abuse
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written by Mary S-FL , October 01, 2009, 10:41:03 AM Certainly medical information is very necessary for everyone. However, much more important is the identity of the true parents and any siblings. The adoption industry is way, way out of control. The original intent,I have to assume, was to provide a good home to a baby or child whose parents were unable to care for them (usually because the mother was a child herself.) The adoption industry has taken this to the ultimate - NEVER IN THEIR LIFETIMES will many American citizens ever be allowed to discover who they are! Not medical conditions in the family, not nationality or religion, not even their own birth name. Shame on all of us. report abuse
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written by Adoptee Rights Coalition , October 01, 2009, 11:21:41 AM Reunions and access to medical information are separate issues entirely from access to original birth certificates. The fact remains that adopted adults are held subject to a contract they did not sign regarding their own birth certificates. It is important to state also that the birth certificates of adoptees are not sealed at time parental rights are terminated; it is only upon adoption. Therefore someone who was surrendered but never adopted still has access to their original birth certificate. Public policy should be based on research and facts, not emotions or supposition. This country now has six states that treat adopted adults with equality. Kansas and Alaska never sealed birth certificates from adopted adults, and Oregon, Alabama, Maine and New Hampshire have overturned these outdated and discriminatory birth certificate laws. As these states have effective, fair and successful legislation that allow adopted adults access to their own birth certificates, the question is not 'Should the remaining states pass restored access legislation? ', but rather, why haven't they? Adoptee Rights Coalition www.AdopteeRights.net report abuse
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written by Priscilla Sharp , October 01, 2009, 11:57:42 AM Medical information at the time of adoption will be old by the time the adoptee grows up. It’s ludicrous to assume nothing would change in 25 years. In my family in 20 years: My mother, sister and daughter had hysterectomies. My mother died in her sleep of stroke or heart failure. My father, 94, fell down, broke his neck and died. My brother had a non-cancerous brain tumor. My uncle died of bone cancer. My daughter has breast cancer… Adoptees are entitled to full disclosure of their original birth certs. No more-no less than what available to every other citizen of the U.S. who was not adopted. This is a basic right to know your origins. The birthmother privacy issue is a red herring designed by adoption agencies, adoptive families and birth *fathers* to cover themselves. No private or public agency can promise “privacy” to anyone beyond what is available to every other citizen — that is, hang up the phone, shut the door, and say “Leave me alone.” If all birthmothers were promised privacy, why is it that a child who was relinquished but never adopted can get his or her original birth certificate? It’s not the relinquishment that seals the certificate; it’s the adoption! A convicted felon who was put up for adoption, but never adopted, can write to the vital stats office and get his birth cert. But millions of law-abiding citizens, who just happen to be adopted, cannot! When will you people in state legislatures wake up and realize the reason these secrecy laws were passed was at the behest of one of the most infamous baby-nappers in the country — Georgia Tann — and were encouraged by adoptive families to hide from bio parents and birthfathers who wanted *their* privacy? Stop hiding behind birthmothers — 98% of us never asked for your imposed privacy! And the 2% of us who do are perfectly capable of saying, “Leave me alone.” We don’t need stupid, archaic laws doing it for us! report abuse
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written by Joan , October 01, 2009, 01:03:06 PM Hi, The states never advertise about any State Registrys. Many States have them. But if a child was born in one state and adopted in another, NEITHER state will give information to the parent or adoptee. So we urge everyone who wants to be reunited to sign up at a MUTUAL CONSENT REGISTRY called International Soundex Reunion Registry Some of you might have heard about ISRR.net. Aunts, uncles,cousins,siblings,adoptees, parents, grandparents, can all sign up on www.isrr.net report abuse
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written by Priscilla Sharp , October 01, 2009, 01:34:37 PM But signing up on registries should *never* take the place of an adult receiving his or her original birth certificate. Adoptees, don't let people push you off and make you stop demanding your basic human right to your identity! Most birthmothers have been so traumatized by society with its stupid campaign of shame and banishment they're too scared to search or sign up on registries. Yet 98% of the mothers we find and contact are DELIGHTED to be found. We promised we would not interfere in our babies' lives. We were told we were horrible, used-up, bad women. We had what society desperately wanted -- beautiful little babies -- and part of getting them away from us and keeping us away from them was to judge and banish us, hopefully forever, with the badge of shame and sin (while most of the fathers walked way Scott-free, mind you, but that's another story you don't want to get me started on!). Registries don't work! Getting original identity is the only answer. report abuse
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written by Jodi , October 01, 2009, 02:36:37 PM I'm an adult adopted person and I have a right to my birth certificate and identity. I never agreed to give up my identity so that I could be raised by my adoptive family. My adoptive parents want me to have the same rights as everyone else. I believe most women want to know what happened to the children they have been separated from. For those who don't, they have the same protections of any other person who does not want to be contacted, just say no thank you. If problems arise, we have laws to deal with them. We aren't criminals and should not be treated as such. I have a basic human right to know who I am and where I came from - all of my parents have their identities - why can't I have mine? report abuse
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written by Joan , October 01, 2009, 02:51:12 PM Hi, yes, what Priscilla wrote is so right. Registrys shouldn't take the place of adults receiving their information. Adoptees should get their Original birth cert. As we all know active searching is key in reunions too. Joan of nyadoptees.com report abuse
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written by Jimm Mandenberg , October 01, 2009, 03:59:34 PM It is a fact that birth certificates are not sealed to protect the identity of relinquishing parents. If that were the intent, birth certificates would be sealed upon relinquishment, something no state has ever done. Birth certificates are NEVER sealed unless a successful adoption is completed. To continue to promote the fallacy of "birthparent confidentiality" is ridiculous at best, given these facts. As previously pointed out, some 2 percent of relinquishing mothers desire privacy from their offspring. Laws assisting them in this choice remain on the books in every state, including those which never sealed birth certificates from adoptees. That leaves 98 percent who desire some level of contact with their children, yet most are prevented by state law. Any law favoring a two percent minority over the rest of civilization smells strongly of favoritism. report abuse
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written by Jimm Mandenberg , October 01, 2009, 04:00:14 PM Groups such as the NCFA claim promises of confidentiality made to some relinquishing mothers must be upheld, even to the detriment of the 98 percent not desiring confidentiality. Most states apparently agree, in direct opposition to their own written law (see first paragraph above). If I can find 2 percent of my state's population who don't like red hair, will the state officially prohibit it? "Wait," you say, "that would be discriminatory - people can't choose their hair color?" You would be right. Webster's defines discrimination as "treatment or consideration of, or making a distinction in favor of or against, a person or thing based on the group, class, or category to which that person or thing belongs rather than on individual merit." Yet, law-abiding adults who were adopted are routinely treated as a distinct, lesser class of humanity when it comes to obtaining a copy of their own record of birth. How can this not be discriminatory? Because lawmakers, accustomed to feeding from the bountiful fruits of the multi-billion dollar private adoption industry, say it isn't. Only when these corrupt individuals are replaced with people concerned with treating all law-abiding adult citizens equally will discrimination be banished from every state. Until then, discrimination towards adoptees will continue to be officially sanctioned and encouraged by the majority of the states. report abuse
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written by pam , October 01, 2009, 04:23:28 PM As a baby scoop era adoptee.. I think what we are all overlooking when it comes to privacy of the birth mother, is that she was coerced by the agencies, social workers, church officials and parents. The decision was not truly hers to make and she MADE to believe that she was doing the most unselfish thing. She was also told that she had no rights and to go on living and FORGET ABOUT surrendering a child. Middle class parents did not want this on their doorstep a unplanned pregnancy.. shame.. And that is what our mothers had to live with guilt and shame, a form of brainwashing from the whole of society. I was lucky enough to get my OBC in Massachusetts and contact my mother. She and I continue a relationship, in private! I have respected her feelings as i would appreciate her to respect mine. I have my OBC.. i know where I came from and I got many answers that i needed to have answered and the same goes with her. Its a proven fact that Registries really only work in a small percentage of cases. The word never gets out and matches are not made. I know this from talking to other adoptees. The studies have further shown that abortion rates do not go up when records are opened. And there are a high percentage of open adoptions which fail and the birth mother is left with nothing except empty promises. report abuse
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written by Lori , October 01, 2009, 05:23:20 PM I, an adoptive mom of 2 young children, am in favor of open records. I am in favor of not creating a separate class of citizens who have fewer rights than other classes. I believe that privacy is not a right and that it never belonged to adoption agencies to manage on behalf of anyone. Access to one's own birth records, however, is a right, currently granted to every citizen who is not an adoptee. That needs to be fixed in all remaining states. report abuse
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written by Patty , October 01, 2009, 05:32:55 PM To make matters worse, in places like CA where certain counties are open & others are not, it's like pulling teeth to get the records. With all the budget cuts & loss in funding, there is no one to answer the phone, pull files, make copies & mail them. Is this happening with the states registries as well? Very likely! If you have to cut your budget as most places are having to do, what to cut first? The person that helps with the States Registries? The person that pulls files in an open state? The person that pulls the OBC & mails it? Also, still today the states receive funding for faciliating more adoptions. So if a child is put into protective custody, while the parents get their act together, it never happens. The child is long gone & adopted out & the states make money for doing this. It's eerily familiar to legal human smuggling! Its a vicious circle! The ones hurt in the long run are the adoptee's they were trying to protect & the birth parents trying to get important medical information to their children that were adopted out. There are a lot of adoptee's that need their medical history to save their lives. Even their doctors need it & can't get it. What's wrong with that picture? You shouldn't have to die because you were adopted. Signed...an adoptee report abuse
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written by Marcie , October 01, 2009, 08:52:45 PM All records pertaining to ones' birth belong to that individual period. The way one came into the world has nothing to do with access to birth records. As a birth mother, I signed nothing and never agreed to sealed records. IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!! Who are the states protecting? These are not babies anymore they are grown adults who are entitled to know where they came from and why. They deserve the truth no matter how difficult it may be. Any birthmother who does not want to be found in my opinion is selfish. Remember, it's not about you? The best gift you can give your grown child is answers. Some of us couldn't fight for our babies years ago, we were young and weak. We have no excuse now. Support Adult Adoptee Rights and unseal the records now! BirthMothers Never Forget. report abuse
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written by judy horner , October 01, 2009, 11:12:18 PM As a mother who relinquished a child for adoption 39 years ago, I spent 31 years with the shame and sadness associated with the trauma of it. My daughter, with whom I have been reunited for 8 years, spent that many years wondering about me and wanting to be found. I think every human being has the right to know her or his biological family. My family has been supportive of our reunion because they have seen how it has filled the gaping hole in my heart that existed for those 31 years of not knowing. report abuse
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written by Jo Anne Swanson , October 02, 2009, 10:16:03 AM One overlooked fact is this: When a baby is born within our borders, he is a newly-minted U.S. citizen, protected fully by our Constitution. His rights are not merely an extension of his mother's, but are totally separate from hers. His birth certificate is his documentation of U.S. citizenship, not his mother's personal record of having given birth. He will need this document for proof of citizenship throughout his lifetime. (Think President Obama and claims of the 'birthers.') Because states have falsified these documents for millions of U.S. citizens and not allowed them access to the originals from which they were altered, adoptees are being denied passports and, in some cases, driver's licenses, based on these unauthentic birth certificates. And things are going to get a lot worse with today's ever-tightening Homeland Security measures. Everything from security clearance for jobs to pilot's licenses depend on authentic documents of U.S. citizenship - and altered birth certificates don't cut it. Some states' laws, in effect, have terminated certain U.S. citizenship rights of adopted children in tandem with their mothers' rights termination. But only if the child is actually adopted; if not - if he languishes in foster care after his mother terminates her rights - his authentic birth certificate remains in his possession. How this passes muster with the legal eagles is one that has millions of folks baffled. But it has to be addressed - and corrected. This situation is beyond unconscionable. report abuse
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written by Christina Darden , October 02, 2009, 10:21:48 PM It is absolutely ridiculous that adoptees in Pennsylvania are subject to archaic ideas and laws denying them to know their birth parent identities. This kind of ignorance causes long term emotional stress on adoptees and their own future bilogical family tree. I want to know who my real mother and father are, and I have a right to know. What the heck are they afraid of? The hard workd is done, both monetarily and emotionally. report abuse
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written by julie j , October 03, 2009, 01:52:35 AM I support equal access to original birth certificates for ALL citizens, adopted or not. I urge everyone to seriously think about the fairness of this. We should not have a separate set of laws & privileges based upon who raised you. It is clearly discrimination as adults who were adopted as minors can never help being in these types of circumstances. Rights were taken away from adoptees decades ago when there was a stigma associated with single parenthood which prompted misguided laws to be created. Archaic laws are still on the books today in 44 U.S. states that routinely falsify a child's birth certificate by listing the people who raised the child as also being the people who gave birth to him/her. Sometimes the place of birth and the date are changed as well at the adopter's request. Then the state places its seal of authenticity on the forged document and permanently hides the original from the adoptee. Birth certificates are historic documents which record the event as it happened; they should never be changed to reflect the current person(s) who have custody of the child. These alterations even apply to so-called "open adoptions." Do not be distracted by the adoption industry and its lobby groups that have fabricated a new right called privacy that they feel they must use to represent first parents. Nothing in writing has ever been discovered that promised anyone privacy! Let me point out the obvious that the adoption industry has never really cared about first parents after parental rights have been relinquished. Their clients are the PAP's and AP's. Those are who line their pockets and whos interests they truly represent, plus their own. Furthermore, first parents do not want or need groups such as the NCFA speaking for them then or now. julie j reunited adult adoptee report abuse
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written by julie j , October 03, 2009, 01:53:11 AM Research shows that 98% of first parents welcome their lost children back into their lives. For those who do not, the same recourses are available as to the general public. However, this is not a reunion issue, it's about equality. Adults in this country have free rights to associate with any other adults. Adoptees should not be presumed to be criminals, and adoption is NOT the witness protection program! As with others in society, we too, are capable of handling our own personal affairs and we not require permanent, mandatory protection from each other, thank you very much. Adoption is supposed to be a service that meets the needs of children - both short & long term needs. Society is inflicting a disservice on adoptees by denying them equal rights as adults. Let's remove the shame, the secrecy, the lies and the stigma from adoption and make it something that better serves us all. Rights should be restored so ALL citizens pay the same fee at the same place to get the same records that pertain to their own births. As with the non-adopted, what one does with their records is irrelevant. Everyone else has their original birth certificates. To be fair, adoptees should have theirs as well. When any one group of a society is discriminated against, every citizen should be concerned about that, not just the discriminated-against group. julie j reunited adult adoptee report abuse
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written by AMANDA J TRANSUE WOOLSTON , October 03, 2009, 02:40:24 PM I support undeniable, unconditional, uncensored access for adoptees to their original birth certificates and adoption records. The lack of such a basic, human, civil and constitutional right (see 14th Amendment) based on outdated stigmas and an ancient laws is an absolute outrage. Adoptees are not monsters, that when given access to their original information will use it to harass their biological families and we cannot treat them as such. The biological parent's preference for privacy IS a preference. HOWEVER, the adoptee's "preference" for their records is NOT a preference, it is a "right." The "right to privacy" in this case is only a right because people say it is. It is not a right, it is a preference. Under no other circumstance in society is it functional nor understandable for a mother to be able to hide her identity from her child. That being said, if her parental rights are terminated, what right does she have to revoke the adoptee's access to THEIR information? We are not fetuses attached to her body any longer. We are not children. We are adult, tax-paying citizens with rights under the law. One individual ought not to control what another individual can and can't know about themselves. Why is this legal? The "preference" for records, on the other hand, is not a preference, it is a right guaranteed to us by the constitution. No other group in the United States is denied their original birth certificates but the American adoptee. This is not a right based on preference. This is a right based on equality and based on what we are guaranteed by the U.S. Constitution. report abuse
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written by AMANDA J TRANSUE WOOLSTON , October 03, 2009, 03:01:37 PM To the OB nurse who called in, I was the product of a rape. Please do not attempt to speak for me or my biological mother. I'm sorry that children who are the products of rape are such horrible reminders. We're not children anymore and we still have the same rights as everyone else. We are not a subclass of citizens. I am not ashamed, do not tell me I should be and do not encourage laws that perpetuate shame. report abuse
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written by Jane , November 04, 2009, 05:21:37 PM I find it interesting that the research done by the National Council for Adoption is internal research. Their Adoption Factbook IV statistics is produced by them, and I don't see that any impartial research organization was used to put together their statistical numbers. Am I wrong? report abuse
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written by Layla Gr3egory , January 14, 2010, 11:10:29 AM I am looking for three of my half sisters named Sonny,Jeanne,and Niki,who were audupted back in the 80's,I don't know there new last names,but the birth mother's last name at the time was Van Brunt(Elise Van Brunt)It was a closed adoption.I found my halh brother whom is 19 years old Gary Walker,whom has a different father than the girls. report abuse
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written by M. Burge , February 28, 2010, 11:27:39 AM I am adopted and I have found my birth Mother and her family. She knew who adopted me and she had adopted me to my adopted family from birth. I remember her trying to call to make sure that I was alright many many times until one day she got a hold of me. She was so excited to hear her only daughter speak to her she was in tears. I am now in my 50's and she has since passed on as so has my materinal grandmother. I am grateful for my family telling me how much my Mother loved me. When she came down with heart problems, the last week of life, she had wanted me by her side. That was her last wish. Why was it that I wasn't aloud to be there for her? Does this seem right? I don't think so when my age was 27 and I was married and had 2 children of my own. She was kept from me and her grandchildren. Was this right? In my sight I do not think so! I in turned had to see my real Mother in a casket for the very first time. Does an average person have to deal with that? No they don't. Was this fair to her? No I believe not! Nor was it right for me!!! Now that Im in my 50's all I want is to get my records on my adoption. This isn't fair that I have to wonder or have to put out money that I don't have. Due to my knowledge I have been blessed to have what family I do have. I have knowledge that my whole family has died of heart problems. The records ought to be opened for I still don't know to this day about my Father's side of the family and if I have other sisters and brothers. What else can we do to open up these files? It stays on my mind as I get older and sicker. How many people can say It shouldn't be so hard to get your families history to know who you really are???? Thank you for the support from family and friends!!! Please feel free to comment. Thank you!! report abuse
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written by Rob K , March 08, 2010, 01:12:47 AM Please visit www.change.org & vote for adopted people to have access to their Original Birth Certificates. The 10 most popular ideas will be presented to relevant members of the Obama Administration, and Change.org will subsequently mobilize its full community to support a series of grassroots campaigns to help turn each idea into reality. We are in 10th Place & are barely hanging on. http://www.change.org/ideas/view/ return_adult_adoptees_the_right_to_their_original_birth _certificates report abuse
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